Worrying, Schooling, and Teaching

Thursday, January 21st, 2010 by Rachel

I thought and thought about making a top 10 of my first semester countlist, but it just didn’t seem right. I’ll give a list in May, when I’m officially halfway through the program.


Just like after my first semester at NAU’s MA, I’m now in a state of crisis. What am I going to do with my life? What is meant for me post-MFA? Do I really want to work on a PhD? Do I really want to go through the stress of another application season? Is being in school something I want to do for another 3-6 years? If I do plan on starting the PhD application process, I’ll have to have solidified my school list by August or September, so I can start asking for recommendations and start the rigorous application process. Since I took the GREs in fall of 06, this is the last application season I could recycle those scores without REALLY pushing the five year rule. I never want to have to retake them.


Part of what plays into a lot of this worrying is Derrick. Derrick and I will have been together for five years in April. As those of you with spouses, domestic partners, children, and pets know, it’s a lot harder to move a family than move just one person. You DO have to think about what’s best for everybody. Times are tough all over, and his job in Flagstaff at the newspaper definitely was NOT stable towards the end. Flagstaff would have never provided enough of an opportunity in terms of providing me (with only a MA) work either. Unfortunately, Derrick hasn’t been able to find a job since moving to Milledgeville, regardless of sending out tons and tons of applications and resumes. It does make things hard, as much as we do enjoy living here in a little yellow house.


Milledgeville doesn’t offer us any long term possibilities. We will have to move once I graduate. We’ve talked about moving somewhere specifically for Derrick, since I can really teach anywhere, especially with the qualifications of a MA and MFA, but I really worry that eventually I won’t be able to provide as much WITHOUT a PhD.


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